Not Me Lord? Can't You Send Someone Else?

"Moses pleaded with the Lord, 'O Lord, I'm just not a good speaker. I never have been, and I'm not now, even after you have spoken to me. I'm clumsy with words." Exodus 4:10 NLT

Moses never had the faith in himself that God had in him. As God pursued him, Moses just kept coming up with excuses why he couldn't fulfill God's need to be the prophet and leader God intended him to be.  He even begged God to send his brother, Aaron in his place. So, finally God agrees that together Moses and Aaron can go on this frightening mission to meet with the Pharaoh and try to change the Pharaoh's mind. God found a way to give Moses the strength needed to fulfill God's request.

I find this story from Exodus 4:1-17 fascinating in too many ways to put on this blog, but the part of this story that sticks in my mind is that Moses lacked confidence and was sure he wasn't the right candidate for the job.  Wow! Do I feel a lot like Moses in a lot of areas in my life! I often find myself pleading with God to find someone else to do what has to be done. I have a really great list of excuses!  You might call it a golden books of excuses. I can come up with some of the best excuses.  Now, that doesn't make me proud, instead it makes me feel very sad.  Why? Why don't I trust and have more faith that God knows me better than I know myself?  Why is my confidence so lacking when I have such faith in God that He is with me every step of the way?  It's mind-boggling to believe so deeply, but yet have such little faith to step out at times!

Often times I find that I'm stuck defining myself by past failures.  Oh that list could write a book bigger than the Bible! But, wait, have I forgotten that God gave the ultimate sacrifice so that I can change the pages of ugly black and red ink to clean unwritten pages? Am I too much like Moses?  Am I so sure that I'm going to fail before I begin, that I bring out my golden books of excuses. Yikes! Maybe God wants to clear the pages in that book as well.  If I were to take the book of failures and the golden book of excuses and see the pages blank, how much different would my life be?  Would it reflect a person that has faith to step out into new adventures trusting that whether you fail or succeed, now has acquired the courage to move forward?

Let us pray:
Father,
You call each of us to make a difference in a world that desperately needs Your guidance.  So often, I feel like Moses and wait for You to send the right person even when I hear Your call.  Remind me that even if others may be able to do it better, that You will always equip me to do the best I can. And also remind me that even if I fail, you will clear that page so that I can write a new page in the book of life. Most of all, remind me that there will be joyful times of success that You and I will celebrate together!
Amen