Seeing the Positive in Marriage through Perspective

"For whatever was written in former days was written for our instruction, so that by steadfastness and by the encouragement of the scriptures we might have hope. May the God of steadfastness and encouragement grant you to live in harmony with one another, in accordance with Christ Jesus, so that together you may with one voice glorify the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ." ~ Romans 15:4-6 NRSV

In just over a week, my husband and I will celebrate our 37th wedding anniversary. I have been blessed to be married to a man that keeps Jesus at the center of his heart, because that love is reflected daily into my husband's love for me and our family. He truly loves me unconditionally. The years have passed by too quickly, and the memories could fill an encyclopedia set. I thought I would pass on some random thoughts about how over the years I have taken some daily situations in our marriage that I once saw as negative, and have grown to realize that there is a positive in most everything if one searches for it and truly trusts in the love of their spouse. 

Disclaimer before reading: We have very traditional roles in our marriage that has worked well for us for 37 years, so please take that into consideration. 

1. I often thought my husband rarely notices when I got my haircut and try to look by best. Then I started thinking about the fact, that he loves me with the hairdo I wake up with every morning and never notices. Grateful!
2. After cleaning the house all day, he comes home and doesn't seem to notice. Oh, but then he doesn't notice the days when he comes home and the house is in disorder. Thankful!
3. The miracle that occurs with his laundry where everything he wears appears back in his drawers and closet clean and smelling great seems to go unnoticed. However, he never has a discouraging word to say if something he needs is still in the laundry basket. Relieved!
4. A clean car may go unnoticed, and yet while on a shopping expedition the car may come home with a scratch or two, and he places no blame on my part and probably wouldn't notice unless I pointed it out to him. Indebted!
5. On those days when it seems the world is crashing down around me, he is there to hold me and reassure me that tomorrow will be a better day. He brings hope! Love!
6. In those moments when I am crabby and hard to love, he loves me anyway. Patience!
7. When I am sick, feeling helpless, and unable to function, he steps in and cares tenderly for me taking care of everything. Provider!
8. If I begin to not see clearly, he gently nudges me back to reality. Encouraging!
9. At times, I think my husband should read my mind and be able to do what I am thinking he should do, I find that if only I ask for help he doesn't hesitate to do what needs to be done. Realized he is not a psychic! Accommodating!
10. Last, but not least, on those days I feel unlovable, he makes me feel special and loved! Committed!

The list could go on and on. It is often the perspective we choose that brings such pain to our relationships. Mine is still in God's training class, but I am trusting what was written so long ago in the Bible to be my guide. As the verse from Romans above says, "For whatever was written in former days was written for our instruction, so that by steadfastness and by the encouragement of the scriptures we might have hope. May the God of steadfastness and encouragement grant you to live in harmony with one another, in accordance with Christ Jesus, so that together you may with one voice glorify the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ." 

I have hope that God continues to mold me into a better wife with a loving perspective to share with my husband each day. I am beyond blessed, and that is my perspective of my relationship with my husband. 

Let us pray . . .

Loving Father,

Thank you for the gift of marriage. Remind us each day that a spouse is one of your greatest gifts. May we glorify you in our relationships with one voice in how we care for one another.

Amen